Are You a Late Bloomer?
Late bloomers are people who find success, fulfillment, or personal growth later than expected. “Bloomer” almost sounds like a happy, optimistic term. I bet if you asked any of them (me included), it’s a road paved with frustration and impatience.
Don’t miss my thoughts on retirement in “Happy, Shiny People”.
Table of Contents
Why the delay?
For folks wired like us, our scattered minds are all over the place. We spend the greater majority of our life figuring things out. It takes us longer to connect the dots, and weed out the projects we’re done with.
We have a hard time discerning what our passion is, and what is a good job to pay the bills. I believe we are slow learners – don’t get me wrong, our minds are brilliant. I just think that our special brains with their a.d.d. tendancies hold us back. There, I said it.
In another article, I talk about the “blame game”. I don’t feel there’s room for it anywhere when you have these special superpowers and you can do anything with them.
Quite honestly, in my late age, I’m just tired of my disorganized brain. I’ve thrown in the towel and had it – in a good way. My brain says, “Well, I’m not going to do THAT anymore!” when it comes to silly little spin-offs that hi-jack my time.
It’s OK to be a little sad at times. I just hope that you can come to love yourself, your brain, and the neat things you have accomplished in your life this far.
– ReneesRabbitHole.com
I’m quicker to stop some of the nonsense – to stop the time wasters and rise the best to the top. That’s my take on it, at least.
Another reason for the delay is our age/generation. I grew up without Internet. I now think of what a wonderful experience that was. I often say that alcohol is to alcoholics as the Internet is to people with a.d.d. brains – toxic. Our a.d.d. generation didn’t even know what a.d.d. was. How could we possible defend ourselves against the tsunami of distractions we’ve seen in our lifetime: smartphones, social media, and gorilla marketing techniques?
Dealing with disappointment
We should be happy that we are late bloomers, right? Well…
Part of being a late bloomer is how you define success or how the outside world defines it. Admittedly, I had this vision in my mind what it would look for me. Let’s not kid ourselves, setting goals is a basic life skill, and I feel I flunked.
I look back at my personal battlefield, strewn with failed passion projects. I tried so many different things. Have you ever read accounts of history that a person isn’t occupied with the same highlight of their life the world is? Instead, they are focused on something they could have done better, aka regrets.
For whatever reason, I’m blooming like crazy. I can’t explain it. I guess it’s just my season and time.
–Renee’s Rabbit Hole
If you feel the same, I hear you. It’s hard to accept delays when we see others on track. So where is there joy in all this? Survival. The knowledge that we have survived despite all our shortcomings.
Let me add another spin on this – hard won wisdom. Younger people don’t have the life experience that we do. Their brains are still growing, they view the world from a different perspective. We were there once. Our early goals may not be the same goals we have now – they’ve changed and we have changed.
And that darn impatience! When one of my kids was in preschool, I was frustrated that they were not hitting an important milestone. The very wise preschool teacher shared these words with me, “Maybe… it isn’t her time yet.” What epic advice – not only for a 4-year old, but anyone at any age of their life.
Counting our blessings – and success
No, I did not get everything in life that I wanted. I’ve always thought about high school class reunions for retired people. I’m sure they can’t help but look around, and reflect on how their life turned out versus the next classmate.
But, I’m thankful, very thankful. I am in good health, I have a beautiful family, we have fun times together. My bills are paid and I am financially stable. Not the riches I have dreamed of, but better off than many people.
Playing the comparing game to those less fortunate quickly provides a reality check. The shallow success displayed on social media, even in our local circles doesn’t tell the whole story. So often, we are only operating with the information of the top 1% of success stories – remember that.
Bringing life into perspective is a way to realize we really do have wins, just on a smaller level. The older I get, the more grateful I am. If you are at the sunset of your life, what do you see? Do you see disappointment in your life, or a life well-lived?
I hope you see some shining stars, because everyone deserves personal success. For late bloomers, it just depends on how they have come to accept their version of it.
Always remember, you’re not alone in these thoughts. It’s OK to be a little sad at times. I just hope that you can come to love yourself, your brain, and the neat things you have accomplished in your life.
We’re in this together – Renee
